Thursday, 24 November 2011

My Mascot

My wee mascot is called the Crohn Ranger. He is a little diseased bundle of fun who loves to give your insides a good squeeze! His absolute favourite is to twist your intestines around in this grip like he's wringing out a wet dish cloth!
The Crohn Ranger is a mischievous character who loves to cause disruption and mayhem at the most inappropriate times!
Are you running late? 'Squeeze!'
Are you on a deadline at work? 'Squeeeeze!'
Are you making an attempt at a social life? 'SQUEEEZE!!'
He hates most foods and likes to remind you of any errors you may make in dietary terms. Stay away from that tasty treat!
He enjoys playing with your temperature too, twisting the heater up and down whenever he feels like it, causing you to go from sauna sweats to antarctic chills in a matter of minutes. Rascal!
The Crohn Ranger loves visiting the doctors surgery and the hospital, he'll have you back and forth like a yo yo! Just can't get enough of that hospital food! Or maybe it's the nurses? Naughty!
He is always keen to remind you he is in the driving seat and any ideas you may get otherwise will warrant a serious reminder painwise! Stay on that little guys good side whatever you do!

Essentially he's a complete bastard.

This post was written as part of NHBPM - 30 posts in 30 days.

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